Wednesday, August 03, 2005

Palm Desert: We Have a Monopoly on Heat

Holy heatstroke. Don't get me wrong, I had a nice, relaxing time. Margarita in one hand, novel in the other, tan lines forming around my bikini. On the other hand, it was literally so hot I wanted to die. After two minutes, you were sweating. After ten, you already felt sunburnt. After thirty minutes, you run to the bar for an icy drink. After an hour, the pool filled with children seems like your only hope.

On Monday, I managed to spend four of these hours by the pool. I ended up getting a pretty good schedule. Ten minutes reading, five minutes in the pool, two minutes laying back with my eyes closed, which was all the time it took to completely dry off, then repeat. I'm not usually a pool person, but there was no way anyone could sit out there for that long without getting in the water. Luckily, I remembered sunscreen, so I didn't burn until three more hours the next day. It's not too bad, considering it felt like the hole in the ozone was directly above us.

If you're having trouble picture this, here's a diagram:
My Vacation in Palm Desert
(click to make bigger)

When you arrive in Palm Desert they assign you a space heater that follows you everywhere, just in case the sun goes behind the clouds or something. It's plugged into the hot air.

On Monday night my mom and I sat on our back porch - oh, we had a PHAT PAD by the way. I have tons of pictures, but I can't upload them to my mom's computer, so they'll have to wait. So we were sitting there, admiring our view of the 9th hole, and suddenly the entire view disappeared behind a wall of sand. I mean, literally, everything vanished. We ran inside and it wasn't long before we heard the thunder, then the power went out. We got the earthquake kit with the flashlights and portable radio from my mom's car and ended up laughing our asses off at things I can hardly even remember now. Including the HUGE tumbleweed that lodged itself next to my mom's car and the ten year old Odwalla bar my mom seemed to think would keep someone alive if they were trapped under debris from a 10.0 earthquake.

Also, we weren't the only ones who questioned going to Palm Desert in August. Not only is it the "off-season" but the entire city is like a ghost town. Stores had signs that said "Will Reopen in September" and the hotel restaurant was only open on the weekends. But, that's okay, I prefer the pool without lots of commotion. We had a good time. I'll be sure to post pictures later, including some of the bunnies and ducks that seemed to live on our porch. Not as cute as baby penguins, but I hear they don't like the desert sun as much.


At 12:24 AM, August 04, 2005, Blogger cg-c said...

HAAA HA HA HA HA! That little diagram almost made me pee my pants. That's TOTALLY what it felt like in Vegas. Even the pool felt like it was heated.

And for once, I was glad to get back to LA where it's 30 degrees cooler. HA!

At 12:27 AM, August 04, 2005, Blogger cg-c said...

BTW - I had to show my Husband your diagram and he got a huge kick out of it - especially the 'half my body weight' bit.

At 1:54 AM, August 04, 2005, Blogger Saucy Lil' Tart said...

I just hate the desert.

At 2:30 AM, August 04, 2005, Blogger Chai said...

hahah, i love the image. hilarious!

At 4:22 AM, August 05, 2005, Blogger Kelly said...

Sounds like all my summers growing up in Tucson. Good times.

My favorite saying: It's a dry heat. Like a blowtorch.

At 11:41 AM, August 05, 2005, Anonymous shell said...

Hehe Well, what do you expect? Palm Springs & Palm Desert are renowned retirement communities. There's something attractive about the heat (that's where all the "Snow Birds" go.)

Relax, enjoy a little spa and pamper yourself. Maybe play a little game of golf? I heard they have some nice courses out there.

At 12:41 PM, August 05, 2005, Blogger Heather said...

That's what I left out of the picture! A blowtorch!

Glad you guys enjoyed my art skillz. I took advantage of the fact my mom has a mouse; I don't think I could make a masterpiece like that with a touchpad.


Post a Comment

<< Home

Listed on BlogShares