Friday, August 12, 2005

See, was that so hard?

I reformatted and moved everything over from my external hard drive. All my settings, bookmarks, even my old email, it's all here. How come I could do this in an hour and a half, but the Green Shirts all had their heads up their asses??

Okay, remember I said I'd tell you about the incident in the LAX bathroom?

I walked into the four-stall bathroom and was the only one there. I closed the door, and was about to get down to business when I hear another girl walk in. She's clearly talking on a cell phone and keeps yapping and yapping to her boyfriend as she goes in the stall next to me. Then I hear this:

Girl: "Okay baby, I gotta pee now....Oh you wanna..?...Okay." So she doesn't hang up and starts peeing. Ew.

Aside from that being gross in itself, I didn't want her boyfriend hearing me peeing, but whatever. So I finish and open the stall door pretty far as I'm leaving, because I have my backpack on and am carrying a small gym bag. Like in all public bathrooms with the metal doors that are made to swing closed, the door hit the frame somewhat hard and shook the other stalls.

Right after it hit I hear the sound of something falling in that girl's stall and liquid splashing all over. No, she didn't get excited and stand up in the middle of her business, instead, lil' miss "listen to me pee" had brilliantly attempted to balance her full starbucks latte on the rounded toilet paper holder.

She screamed into the phone, "OH MY GOD! SOME IDIOT JUST SLAMMED THE DOOR AS HARD AS SHE COULD AND SPILLED MY COFFEE ALL OVER ME!! BITCH!!"

Okay. Number 1: Bringing your hot milk into the bathroom is gross. (And she also said she just bought it...she couldn't have gone to the bathroom first?) Number 2: Trying to balance it on a rounded surface is beyond dumb. Number 3: Ha!!

I tried really hard not to laugh as she kept screaming to her boyfriend about how someone maliciously attacked her by violently shaking the stall doors to the ground. Actually, I was a little afraid she was going to come out with her pants down and punch me in the face, but even that would have been funny. Luckily I finished washing my hands and got out of their before she was done.

Okay, I'm in the middle of watching Million Dollar Baby. Don't tell me how it ends.

5 Comments:

At 8:29 PM, August 12, 2005, Blogger Saucy Lil' Tart said...

Oh my GAWD. WTF? That is a fantastic story, and unbelievable that it's true. Who talks on the phone, balances a coffee, and takes a piss all at the same time? Doth she have no common sense?

I'm guessing the answer is yes. So, I'm also guessing she got what was a-coming to her!

 
At 10:44 PM, August 12, 2005, Blogger CM said...

I hate it when that happens. The other day I had a big bowl of french onion soup, and you guessed it -- somebody slammed the door and it fell all over me, and the cheese went right in the toilet! Life is so unfair sometimes.

 
At 12:31 AM, August 13, 2005, Blogger cg-c said...

Loved that story! Airports provide the best experiences. And I'll be her coffee was from Coffee Bean, not Starbucks. HA!

 
At 5:14 AM, August 13, 2005, Blogger Eve said...

Someone did that to me while I was trying to eat a powerbar in the bathroom at the bar exam, and my bar went in the toilet. Weren't you at Ontario too? What are you, some kind of bathroom-stall-shaking-food-dropping-in-toilet-wacko!? ;) ha ha ha, just kidding. That's a funny story! :)

 
At 1:31 PM, August 13, 2005, Blogger G. said...

HILARIOUS!

 

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