Gardening is hard work.

The wind is coming out of my sails on this horticulture thing. Every morning I take my precious little seedlings downstairs for a warm water bath, then wrap them up real good in their ghetto greenhouse:

That seems to be working - look at all that condensation. I bet my babies are losing a lot of weight in their private sauna. Then I turn on the halogen while I'm at work so they get plenty of light and warmth during the day. At night, I refresh the water a little and turn off the light.

And what do I get for all my hard work:

DIRT!

Honestly, it's been, what? Five days now? I'm getting wrinkles. I'll be on social security by the time they feel like peeking out of the mess there. Where's the instant gratification? I planned a tomato salad for Sunday. Looks like I'll have to scrap that. C'mon boys, people are waiting for your grand arrival.