Friday, December 01, 2006

A public service announcement

Twenty-seven is old. At least, that's the medical diagnosis.

In conversation the other day Sommer asked if I knew anything about that new vaccine that can prevent cervical cancer, but I didn't and neither of us knew anyone who'd gotten it. I already had an appt to get my bc today, so I figured I'd ask my doc about it since I was there. Turns out 27 is outside the "range" they've given for the vaccine. It seems that I used to be totally at risk but in the eight months since my birthday I've apparently had so much sex that I must have now acquired the virus. That's their logic anyway. Then there's poor, just-past-her-birthday-and-now-too-old-to-live Sommer:

Sommer: so, i'm a week too late?
Sommer: to prevent cancer? aargh

Yup. Sorry, dude. A lot happens in a week. Civilizations rise and fall. We outlive our cancer-preventing medical miracles. You know. I didn't get too much more info, except that it's not widely available yet despite the onslaught of commercials you're seeing, and that it costs an arm and a leg (seriously, it's twice as much as the most expensive vaccine I got for India). But if you're one of those at-risk youngins, you might want to inquire before you turn into an old, infected fart like me.


At 6:57 AM, December 07, 2006, Blogger bekbek said...

Wow, 27 is so old. I mean, it's so 90s!

It's like you can't get that new vaccine that prevents aging, because you're too old.

It's like any day now I'm going to hear that I don't need the vaccine because I'm no longer using my cervix.

Excuse me?


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